Mrs Nnenna Nnadozie Maduabuchi, a highly noticeable Akahlite, social worker and a member of many Christian organizations in Lagos is always herself when it comes to expressing her views on vital issues that concern the society at large. The first daughter of the late Akatrotic Ahahlite, Chief Dennis Nwoke (Ebu) and popularly known as D.O, was really happy speaking with Umuaka Times on many social vices including rape and domestic violence that confront our society today.
Please read on.
Hello, please can we meet you?
Am Mrs. Nnenna Nnadozie Maduabuchi
Which part of Umuaka are you from?
Am from Ugbele -Akah.
Many people really wonder why you are always vocal and speak your mind on political and social issues concerning Nigeria on social media. What really is your inspiration?
Well the dreams of my late father, which were not accomplished because of untimely death inspire me to speak on political and social issues in Nigeria.
Who is your late father ?
Late chief Dennis Nnadozie Nwoke…(D.O)
Waow. That is great. Can you share with us some of those his dreams?
I wish to respect his dreams by not disclosing them but keep hope and faith alive to actualize them.
You mean his dreams were a top secret?
Not at all, but with all due respect to his soul, his dreams live on in me.
Umuaka Times is aware that to give his children quality education was a part of his dreams. After his demise, your mother took that dream alone and brought up the children. What is your take on that?
For me that is a strength of a woman who desired to see the dreams of her late husband fulfilled. I give her kudos for that.
How many lawyers do you have in the family now?
I see the question as more private and don’t wish to talk about it…
You read at Girls Technical School Umuaka, were you a part of the old girls that worked on the great institution last December by embarking on renovation?
What do you have to say about the spirit of unity among the old girls in view of the renovation project?
Can’t say much because I was not anywhere near the picture.
Generally, are you happy with Umuaka daughters and wives in their efforts to create a good life for themselves and families?
Definitely yes. I am.
Can you explain further?
No further explanation needed, it is a definite yes that I am glad to know that our wives and daughters are working tirelessly and helping to create a good room for both their husbands and familes at large.
Let’s go international a little. Recently, someone was killed in America a couple of weeks ago by name George Floyd. He was a Blackman and he was murdered by the police in what looked like racist murder. Some Nigerians were protesting here in Nigeria over the incident while almost the same week, a girl was raped and killed in Edo State, another 14 year old killed by the police in Lagos and another raped and killed in Ibadan. These Nigerians never protested. What is your take on that?
May their souls find peace with the Lord Amen. Well if you followed the case of the Benin girl, there was a protest by the youths in her community, they destroyed some parts of the church building, they didn’t keep quiet….
In the case of George Floyd, the protest was pronounced because of the manner in which he was murdered. (I call that pure hatred murder.)
In your own assessment, how do Nigerians view rape?
Nigerians don’t really see rape in the real sense of it as a crime. Which is one reason it is taking the other of the day now.
But why do people feel less concerned about rape including women bodies?
For me, in this part of our world Nigeria precisely, laws are created and not implemented. When a girl is raped, the immediate family tends to hide it away from the society for fear of what I term as not being properly educated of what risk, the girl child stands to face if her issues are not addressed by bringing the rapist to book.
So how do we encourage women to rise above this fear?
Rising above this fear depends on individuals..there are people who take things easy and some to extreme, but generally, I think women should be enlightened about rape, the trauma and the danger the rape victim faces.
The need for you to open up to someone when it happens, the faster you are healed from the trauma …Remember rape is a crime punishable under the law and women should be educated on that too.
Yes indeed, rape is a crime but some women have totally condemned the way some other women dress which exposes them to rape. Do you agree with them that by so doing, they contribute to the escalating cases of rape in the country?
Well, provocative dressing for me has nothing to do with a rapist…..Come to think of it, a 40 year old man who raped a 9 year old girl was she dressed to kill? The recent girl that was raped inside the church was she not decently dressed? A rapist is a rapist, if you like wear double jeans trouser.
You mean indecent dressing does not contribute at all?
I don’t believe that because of indecent dressing women get raped. In as much as I don’t encourage indecent dressing. Women should dress decently please.
Ok, what will be your advice to women on how to avoid rape?
Well, advising on measures to be taken to avoid being raped might not necessarily make sense because most rapists come in as friends…then turn monster in between. A husband can be a rapist, a father can be, a friend can also be. The word being careful might make little or no difference here, all I can say is mind the company you keep, avoid lonely paths and lonely places, avoid late night movements and most importantly be prayerful.
Ok. What in your mind do you think will be an appropriate punishment for rapists in Nigeria?
Of how many years?
7 years with hard labour
That is cheap. Currently it is around 25 years. Why do you want the reduction?
Your initial question was how many years, and I said 7 years with hard labour, but, if the current jail term is up to 25 years let the person go and face it .
Does it disturb you that women are now leaders of domestic violence, to the extent that husbands are now stabbed and killed because of ordinary text messages?
Am I disturbed ?…the answer is no in the sense that no one out of violence has the intention of killing, is just an accident that turned fatal …
I don’t think 95% of the women that killed their husbands in the act of violence in marriage planned it…
I don’t support violence in marriage as a measure of corrections either….violence in marriage is a death trap that can either take the lives of both couples.. I think this issue of violence in marriage should be looked into properly .
Are you sincerely standing for women who have killed their husbands that it was a mistake?
Going back to my response, I said 95% of the killings was not planned…it was not intentional. Killing someone is not a year plan remember, not to talk of a man that has married you for years.
But the court judgments we have show otherwise. Most of these wife killers have so far been sentenced to death. Are you aware?
Well, court works with “evidence before me”, and the ability for the defender to prove beyond all reasonable doubts that it was not her intention to kill…Above all is God that has the final judgment
Ok what of those men who have killed their wives also. Do you think theirs was accidental or intentional?
Like I early said, no man goes to marry a wife just to murder her, I still rate my percentage to 90% as an accident..and not intentional.
So how do we settle this issue of domestic violence? Are you aware many house helps have been killed also?
Settling domestic violence?….hahaha.An animal is always an animal no matter the name it bears ….A violent person is a violent person not minding his environment. All he needs is a little trigger and he fires his bullet..
Or her bullet?
(General laughter) Well in spite of all, I think if you realize that your spouse is temperamental try very hard to avoid what will trigger his temper, pray always for there is nothing impossible for God to do. Avoid all unnecessary arguments, always accept you are at fault even if you are not to avoid the beast in him. Always say am sorry at that point and try to leave the scene….make sure issues are resolved within a time frame , is not easy to do but God who sees your intentions will walk with you.
Why are you putting it to suggest that men are always the devil in the issue of domestic violence?
Does my response imply so?
Yes it does but be that as it may…we have on record that married women usually abuse their house helps…they have inflected permanent injuries to most of them and eventually killed some. What is your advice to those parents who send their children to work as house helps?
My advice to them, is to be very sure who you are sending your child to, make sure from time to time you have access to speak with your child and ask questions. Give advice when necessary.
Which Christian denomination do you belong to?
Am proudly Catholic.
Does the Catholic Church have any group that works in conjunction with some NGOs with the aid of ending domestic violence?
Yes the JDPC.
Justice and Development Peace Commission
Does it also pain you that child abuse and domestic violence can be found deeply among Christians in Nigeria?
At least 70% of Nigerians are Christian so we don’t expect otherwise.
But that is against the teachings of Christianity.
Yes we all know but remember that the Bible said, Christ came for the sinners and not the righteous. So if there is no sin there would be no Christ.
Your answer did not address the question. It appears you justified the act by that answer.
There is no justification, in my answer, all manners of evil are condemned by both Christians and non Christians, and hence as Christians we are given a second chance in repentance and that is the essence of Christ coming to redeem sinners.
But you forgot to condemn it the way you outrightly condemned rape why? You are giving them a soft landing.
In rape, It takes only one person to take the decision, In house help issues, it takes both parties in the sense that provocation can come through the child…unlike the rape case.
I am asking why you condemned rape totally without saying Jesus came for them but now you are saying Jesus came for Christians who abuse their house helps. Why are you creating the difference considering the fact that both are violence?
My answers are based on your related question to each crime.
Still talking about Christians, recently a Catholic reverend father was quoted as warning some newly married women in one town in the South East Nigeria who are in the habit of cooking food and bringing to young reverend fathers. Is it good for some women to cook food and bring to priests while they know that the priests have their cooks and have a lot to eat?
In this respect I don’t wish to speak on it, because it is just a mere quote. No confirmation. And in another view, I personally don’t discuss issues when it involves an ordained minister of God. Thank you.
Do you discuss issues when it involves pastors?
Any ordained minister, be it Alfa, pastor etc. I don’t discuss them.
Ok but in this case, you are not discussing any of the above. The question seeks to get your view on the act of some newly married women who cook food and present to ordained men of God. Is that act commendable?
There is no way I will discuss this issues without reference,so I think we should skip it and ask other questions. Giving food to anyone irrespective of class ,status ,should not be a crime on the literally meaning of it, but when you make reference to an ordained minister of God, I don’t wish to speak on that with all due respect.
Don’t talk about the men of God, talk about the women.
The above answers your question
Ok. Can you correct or talk about a fellow Catholic who went astray?
Why do you narrow your questions to Christians?
Because you are a Christian…you are not a Muslim or pagan.
Can you correct or talk about a fellow Catholic who went astray? If he or she is within my jurisdiction to talk to definitely I will.
What will you tell her?
As regards to???
To your last answer.
What I will tell her will be based on the matters on grounds.
Can you elaborate further??
Nothing to elaborate here, unless I have issues on ground to talk to him/her about.
Thank you very much Mrs. Nnenna Nnadozie for your time. It was a thrilling sensation talking with you.
You are welcome, is my pleasure too.